So my partners and I thought we should stop dilly-dallying around making short films and plunge head first into the production of our first feature film. The project is titled Rose of Death, and it’s not going to break one bit of new ground in cinema history.

But that doesn’t bother us.

See, it’s a slasher film. A really violent, gory slasher film. But that’s because we like those kinds of films. Loftier people may look down on us for wasting hundreds and even thousands of feet of digital videotape on, what they would call, a worthless endeavor, but, goddammit, we’re gonna have fun doing it.

Plus, we’re not lofty people.

We are just normal film geeks who are stuck in dead-end, crappy-ass jobs that are draining every last bit of creative energy out of us. So we are breaking out before we end up with a “brain cloud” or some other “life”-draining disease.

And what better way to break out of a cruddy office job than to write about extremely violent killings? Because writing about them is cathartic. Letting your emotions get bottled up for years and years while wishing for a better life to magically come along but it doesn’t so you go and get an Uzi and blow away all the annoying fucks you work with … is criminal. And I’m sure I speak for numerous filmmaker-wannabes out there when I say, “While I do have these criminal thoughts floating around in my head, I know that my creativity would be even more oppressed if I were wasting away in a jail cell.” So, instead of killing these people literally, I’m going to have to kill them figuratively. Which can be a lot more fun anyway.

I come from the school of thought where I like to see really violent images on film but not necessarily in real life. Which I guess makes me un-American since everyone in America always complains that watching violent images makes you commit violent acts. I have yet to be influenced in such a way. The Japanese have yet to be influenced in that way either, and they watch probably even more violent films and shows than Americans do.

Jesus! Who put this fucking soapbox here??

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